Lessons on Seasons, Growth, and Relevance

 With over six decades of walking the earth, I have come to embrace one indisputable truth: there are no permanent friends and no permanent enemies. Human relationships are not static; they ebb and flow with time, season, and circumstance. People connect with you when your journey aligns with theirs, and sometimes they disconnect when life’s rhythm takes a different turn. Like a drumbeat that changes tempo, the steps of the dance must also adjust. The key lesson? Focus on your personal growth and never stop evolving, for you remain relevant only when people can still associate with the progress they see in you.

Think of life as a vast field where relationships are like crops. Some friendships are like seasonal plants—they sprout quickly, serve their purpose, and wither away when their time is up. Others are like perennial trees—rooted and enduring, but even they experience pruning, shedding, and renewal. When we misunderstand this, we set ourselves up for heartbreak. Expecting permanence from people who were meant only for a season is like expecting harmattan to last all year—it simply cannot.
I remember an old saying: “When the drumbeat changes, the dancer must change his steps.” Relationships work in the same way. A friend may be your closest ally when you share the same environment, workplace, or social circle. But when the context changes, so might their loyalty and commitment. This is not always betrayal; sometimes, it is simply life’s way of teaching us adaptability.
Many people waste precious years lamenting over relationships that faded or turned sour. We pour energy into chasing shadows of yesterday, forgetting that the present demands our focus. The truth is that life rarely leaves a vacuum. If one person exits, another often enters, sometimes to play a more fitting role for the new chapter of your journey. If you stubbornly hold on to expired relationships, you may miss the fresh connections that God or destiny is sending your way.
Take a practical example: Consider someone who worked in a company for 20 years, surrounded by colleagues who felt like family. The day they retired, the phone calls stopped, the invitations dwindled, and the familiar voices went silent. At first, it feels like abandonment, but in reality, it is the natural order of seasons. Those colleagues were tied to that phase of life, and when the environment shifted, so did the closeness of the bond. Does that mean those friendships were fake? Not necessarily. It means their purpose was fulfilled.
If relationships are subject to time and change, what then should remain constant? The answer is personal development. When you invest in your growth—mentally, spiritually, emotionally, and even professionally—you remain relevant no matter the season. People are drawn to progress. When they see growth in you, they find fresh reasons to stay connected. But when growth stops, stagnation sets in, and your circle inevitably shrinks.
Make up your mind today to invest in your growth more than before.